Sunday, January 29, 2006

Son of Random Ten Battles the Molemen

I have an ipod now. Which changes Everything.

01. Manic Street Preachers, “Interiors (Song for Willem de Kooning)”
This was never my favorite song from Everything Must Go, but listening to it now, I really do like it a lot, even if I don’t really understand what if anything it’s trying to convey. 8/10

02. Joe Jackson, “The Band Wore Blue Shirts”
I just don’t like this song. I find it silly, and not in a good way. 4/10

03. AmIEviL, “Blaster Master DancerMaster”
Yes, a remix of a song from Blaster Master. When I was small, I only played it a few times at a friend’s house, but I still developed kind of a nostalgic attachment. This is a quality track; good tune, hard-rocking. 7/10

04. Steeleye Span, “Treadmill Song”
Excellent. My understanding is that at some point in English history, convicts were in fact required to basically walk on treadmills. That’s what ultimately did in Oscar Wilde, I believe. The melody really evokes the idea of grim, repetitive labor. Compelling. 9/10

05. Tom Waits, “Broken Bicycles”
Summer is gone…our love will remain. Like old broken bicycles out in the rain…The highlight of the One from the Heart soundtrack. Very haunting. 9/10

06. The Beatles, “Long, Long, Long”
Blah, blah, blah. Why did I rip this tripe? 3/10

07. The 101ers, “Sweety of the St. Moritz”
The 101ers being Joe Strummer’s pre-Clash band, of course. Pretty straightforward rocking. 7/10

08. James, “Say Something”
What to say? This may be one of the lesser songs from Laid, but it’s still a song from Laid. 7/10

09. Joe Strummer, “Smash Everything”
You know, in case saying something doesn’t work. An instrumental from the Walker soundtrack; not as ferocious as the title would imply, unfortunately. 6/10

10. 16 Horsepower, “Single Girl”
Yee haw! 8/10


Saturday, January 28, 2006

Sad but true.


Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Spam subject lines that make me giggle

The internet is a funny place. Also, scary.

the giant pecker drilled Annie without control

You always wanted to use your penis as a billiards cue.

Try to tame this fire which hides within hot mature women with an explosive lust for young boners.

The Pacific is nothing comparing to the ocean of your sperm with Spermamax.

With Ultra Allure Pheromones women will hunt for you like the hunters hunt for deer.

Virility Patch will make your penis noticeable from the distance of 1 mile.

With our Soft Cialis Tabs you will be able to chop the wood with your dick.(Warning: don’t try it).

(is that disclaimer a misguided stab of humor, are were they actually worried that someone would take them up on this claim and subsequently take legal action against them? All I know is, I’d pay to see those court proceedings.)

Re: Intensive French at Middlebury College

Man, where to start? Well, firstly, at a certain point I have to question the pedagogic theory here: this might well be very useful for beginning or intermediate students, but once you reach a certain level--which I had definitely done--being surrounded by fellow students who, like you, are only speaking disjointed, poorly-accented French really isn't going to do much for you. But even beyond that, the grammar course we were required to take was weirdly low-level. Given that I was in the highest level here, it was just odd.

On a non-course-related level: holy SHIT was this program ever cliquish. Whether I actually wanted to BE in any of these groups was questionable, given how...unpleasant I found a lot of my fellow students, but be that as it may, I didn't exactly have the option. It was an isolating experience. And then my alive. I'm not saying that ol' Optat was a bad person; I really never got to know him well enough to say. Although he had a whole bunch of Bibles and books on being true to the faith and abstinence and whatnot, which I found a little humorous. But what I WILL say is that, due to time zone differences, he could apparently ONLY talk to his family in Tanzania late at night. Ever try to sleep while someone else in the room is having long, loud phone conversations in Swahili? Not as fun as you might think.

And although I never really had any dealings with him, the director of the program was apparently kind of creepy. He resigned for unspecified reasons soon after the Summer. Huh.

So anyway. Was glad to be out of there.

Sunday, January 08, 2006

The Spike & Crusher Show

So a few Summers ago I was studying French intensively at Middlebury College. Not such a fantastic experience, but one thing that was amusing was the trays in the cafeteria: it was rather easy to etch things into them with a fork, and at some point, two individuals (we presume) named "Spike" and "Crusher" had written various back-and-forth dueling attacks on, I swear, virtually every damn tray. Other people obviously got involved at some point; it wasn't just the two of them. But regardless: at some point, I started jotting them down, and then I totally forgot about it until today, when, whilst cleaning out some things, I found the notebook where I'd written them. So anyway, here they are.

Crusher feeds the animals.

Spike & Crusher don't get PE Credit.

Crusher thought Dean had a chance.

Spike is corporate America.

Crusher is good enough for government work.

Spike hates on his girlfriend's dad.

Crusher can't speak English.

Budtz [?--a non-canonical entry, clearly] doesn't spray the waffle iron.

Spike works at the 5th largest container port.

Spike forgets his flair.

Spike skips tourneys because of "too much work."

Crusher says you can't spell crap without rap.

Spike is a terminal preppie.

Crusher hates American family farmers.

Crusher only tips five percent.

Spike tries to steal me lucky charms.

Crusher goes cuckoo for cocoa puffs.

Spike is the man who sold the world.

Crusher bought it on ebay.

Crusher smoked himself retarded.

Spike fears the dank forest.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Welcome to the World of Tomorrow!

Let's hope 2006 is better than the last few years we've had. I would not hold my breath, however.